I’m a freshman in college who has been lucky enough to land an office job in the administration office at my school. That’s all fine and dandy, especially since it’ll give me experience that not many can claim. However, over the last few months, I’ve been taking steps to begin my transition (such as preparing to move out, scheduling appointments with doctors to get a script for testosterone, etc) and as I’ve been doing this, one of the biggest things looming over my head is: “how will I come out at work”.
I go to an LGBT friendly/inclusive school that actually has trans*-inclusive healthcare so I imagine they cannot discriminate against me tremendously. However, the thought of what will be said behind my back, the looks I’ll get when I’m able to use the men’s restroom, etc. may be more anxiety-inducing than blatant discrimination. I know this is something almost all transgender individuals must go through, but it’s seriously deterring me from staying at this job and possibly transitioning (for now). However, I don’t have retail experience/experience in job areas where there are trans-friendly companies. I’ve only ever had office experience and am going for a degree in the sciences (which won’t be applicable until I graduate) so I’m lost. I’m seriously considering applying for many jobs and only leaving when I have secured another position. However, if I transition in the next job and lose it, I’ll be unemployed with a phone bill, rent/bills, and a possible car note (depending on my rent). Logically, it’d make sense to stay and transition, but anxiety is eating me alive.
I’d love some advice/tips from those of you who have transitioned in the work place. I realistically may cut my hours next semester and pick up a night job where I can transition without much fuss. If I decide to take a semester off/drop out of college, this current job will be history anyway as I will not be a student anymore. It’s a lot of stuff that’s just up in the air, but the job situation is the most bothersome at the moment as it’ll affect my income and ability to continue on with life.
This is just a little snippet of what’s been on my mind. I’ll probably post another post up in a few minutes in a more upbeat tone. If you wish to contact me, feel free to comment or email me at the email below. Thanks for reading!
Email: JCollins1594@gmail.com
journeytojames 
Hey James,
Coming out is really scary. Your worries make a lot of sense. It’s a weird, vulnerable experience. Since you work at a LGBT-friendly college, I think you’re actually in a good position. I’d guess your school has an inclusive non-discrimination policy–if so, it might put your mind at ease to read it. You might be pleasantly surprised by how your boss and co-workers react.
I transitioned as a sophomore/junior. I didn’t have a job at the time (what a bum!), but I remember being really nervous to contact my instructors about my preferred name and pronouns. My worries were all for naught–I didn’t have even one bad experience. My professors were all really supportive, and the few classmates I discussed the issue with were cool about it as well. People even told me I was brave and stuff like that. One time, early in transition, a male classmate gave me a confused look in the men’s room. When I went ahead with my business, he apparently concluded it was his mistake–he was friendly and accepted me as a guy.
So my advice, for whatever it’s worth, is that you not preemptively quit or postpone transition because of the chance things will go badly. Maybe you could make a back-up plan just in case the situation becomes intolerable, set aside some extra money and have an idea about how you might get a new job. It’s good to prepare for the worst.. It sounds like you’re a person who is really organized and has their shit together–you’ve obviously carefully considered your expenses and stuff–so I wonder if you might already have “prepare for the worst” kinda covered. Don’t forget to hope for the best, too.
Best of luck dude.